The Do-Nothing Weekend
Less the title be misleading, let me elaborate: I was hanging out with someone this past weekend and he convinced me to resurrect something I used to incorporate into my life years ago. Back then, I worked approximately 5-6 jobs over 6-7 days a week; I barely slept, downed a lot of coffee, managed to socialize at night (if I wasn’t babysitting) and yet, loved all of my teaching and childcare positions. But, suffice it to say, I was always exhausted, always hanging on by a thread, waiting for that occasional day off, which would usually be filled will chores and errands anyway.
I have always been someone who likes people and enjoyed jobs where I was constantly interacting with them, but this usually resulted in me coming home and only want to curl up with a book, or bake something, or basically engage in an activity that was all about ME and didn’t involve any talking. I specifically remember expressing, “I just can’t talk anymore.” This proves to be difficult when you have a lot of friends, roommates and a live-in boyfriend! On my first date day with that (pre-live-in) said boyfriend, we attended my friends’ law school comedy show in Boston, where he lived at the time. (This was after I spilled soup all over my skirt at MFA with friends, then he and I met up at Starbuck’s, he got feisty with the barista for not having fair-trade coffee, and I threatened to walk out right then and there, almost having the shortest relationship (34 seconds?) in the history of time.) On the comedy show booklet, he made me write, “Next weekend: Do nothing, then write about it.”
Take time to…
The idea is not to do nothing–because really, what does that mean? Even sleeping and watching TV are somethings–but to only do things for yourself, that don’t involve running around the city, that don’t really involve making plans with ANYONE. Sometimes I would cancel with friends and make the mistake of being honest, saying, “Yeah, I want to read a novel,” or “I just don’t feel like being around people–don’t take it personally” (Ha, right!) This wasn’t always received well, but I tend to be pretty blunt to a fault and I treasure my alone time too much to make light of it. Call it selfish, but isn’t that a good way to be selfish?
Since going freelance, I find myself just as harried and sleepy all the time from work, and not a day goes by that I don’t work, so the Do-Nothing Weekend hasn’t even been on the radar. I’ve also had a ton of house guests lately! But that will all change this weekend because I am going to try with all my might to turn down ALL plans to go out and do things, concentrating on me, myself and I. I’ll have to do *some* work, but that’s okay. Here are some of my ideas:
-catch up on sewing projects (some mending, making a bag from tea towels/placemats, cookbook binder covers)
-attempt to knit/crochet for personal use (as opposed to work); a cowl, perhaps?
-go to the farmer’s market with specific recipe in mind and buy ingredients and hopefully cook for hours
-catch up on a slew of Godard films
-listen to my Mitch Hedberg cd, one of my birthday gifts!
-squeeze in a bike ride, potentially to Coney Island in a “coming full circle” way that I will elaborate on if I do it; weather permitting
–read for at least 3 hours
-delve into a personal writing project and actually pursue, like my “philosophy of pie-baking” or “always talk to strangers” ideas
November 12th, 2008 at 10:42 am
I would love to read an essay entitled “My philosophy of pie baking.” And a do nothing weekend sounds like such a luxury. Hope it works out!
November 12th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
Sounds like heaven. I haven’t seen Week End, but there is something about Godard that does make downtime sparkle a little more. Love this post — have I mentioned lately what I huge fan I am? 🙂
November 12th, 2008 at 5:38 pm
Mitch Hedberg, yay.
November 13th, 2008 at 11:03 am
@chrysanthe, it’s coming! I got a proposal of marriage based on the concept alone. 😉
@Sarah Godard, yes!!! A Godard-watching party with French food sounds pretentious, but I kinda want to do it some day! Thanks for being a huge fan! I’m one of yours as you know. 🙂
@Kristina Strain, he is the best!
November 13th, 2008 at 9:40 pm
On the topic of bluntness – during a battle with mental health issues that left me with seriously limited social interaction capabilities, I learnt to tell people that I wasn’t going out because I needed me time, just wasn’t up to it, couldn’t leave the house, whatever totally frank thing was going on at the time. Some people didn’t handle it, and I don’t see them much anymore. But a surprising number told me later that my attitude (which I saw as totally selfish) actually put them at ease. They felt free and empowered to tell me when they were too tired to catch up, or their essays were overwhelming, whatever. So what I felt was selfish was actually generally liberating.
The moral of the story is that honesty and bluntness in this context are GREAT. People who can’t handle it need to get a grip. So there.
November 13th, 2008 at 10:21 pm
@bex Totally! I completely agree. I had a ton of health problems for years and had to do the same “I can’t come out” speal, and yeah, it surely “weeds out” the bad eggs in your life. I found the same thing happen to with friends–they were “free” to tell ME if they weren’t up to it and it was all good!
November 18th, 2008 at 11:49 am
[…] on Saturday morning at 6am, after a night of working. Hooray, I thought, I will get so much done on my do-nothing weekend! Craft projects, cookie recipes and novels floated around in my mind. As I put the coffee on, I […]
December 4th, 2008 at 12:17 am
Wow–are you really living the dream and soely supporting yourself on freelance projects?! If so, congratulations!!! How did you make the leap. Also, I applaud your do-nothing weekends, but they really are so difficult to actually achieve. I’ll be happy with a do-nothing day first.
December 4th, 2008 at 12:18 am
pardon my spelling errors!